Thursday, October 26, 2006

WHO IN HOLLYWOOD HATES AMERICA?

Spurious George Names Names!

(Sodom and Gomorrah, CA) As the most important election in American history (that doesn’t involve George Bush) approaches, we here at Spurious George feel compelled to identify for you, our red state readers,
the ever-growing list of Hollywood elite who hate your freedom. The following is a list of the worst of the worst; satanic celebs who give ONLY to Democrats (and who, more than likely, funnel their box office take to al Queda cells):



Ben Affleck, Jessica Alba, Jason Alexander, Joan Allen, Krista Allen, Kristie Alley, Louis Anderson, Julie Andrews, Christina Applegate, Dan Akroyd, Lauren Bacall, Anne Bancroft, Drew Barrymore, Kim Basinger, Justine Bateman, Ned Beatty, Tom Berenger, Candice Bergen, Valerie Bertinelli, Robert Blake, Barry Bostwick, Peter Boyle, Lorraine Bracco, Zach Braff, Lloyd Bridges, Matthew Broderick, Adrien Brody, James Brolin, Albert Brooks, Mel Brooks, Pierce Brosnan, Carol Burnett, Nicholas Cage, Tia Carrere, David Caruso, Patricia Clarkson, George Clooney, Courtney Cox, Marcia Cross, John Crier…

…Beverly D’Angelo, Willem Dafoe, Timothy Dalton, Tim Daly, Susan Dey, Angie Dickinson, Fran Drescher, Patrick Duffy, Patty Duke, Nora Dunn, Eliza Dushku, Anthony Edwards, Edie Falco, Mia Farrow, Farrah Fawcett, Will Ferrell, Linda Fiorentino, Carrie Fisher, Joely Fisher, Brendan Fraser, Morgan Freeman, Andy Garcia, Jennifer Garner, Brad Garrett, Paul Giamatti, Marla Gibbs, Jeff Goldblum, Cuba Gooding Jr, John Goodman, Lou Gosset Jr, Heather Graham, Kathy Griffin, Andy Griffith, Charles Grodin, Jasmine Guy, Maggie Gyllenhaal…



…Mariska Hargitay, Valerie Harper, Josh Hartnett, Salma Hayek, Anne Heche, Marilu Henner, Cheryl Hines, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Kate Hudson, Felicity Huffman, Helen Hunt, Timothy Hutton, Kate Jackson, Samuel L Jackson, Alison Janney, James Earl Jones, Ashley Judd, Diane Keaton, Michael Keaton, Harvey Keitel, Nichole Kidman, Greg Kinnear, Diane Lane, John Larroquette, Matt LeBlanc, John Leguizano, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Lucy Liu, Christopher Lloyd, Jennifer Lopez, Rob Lowe, Kyle MaLachlan, Shirley Mac Laine, William H Macy, Virginia Madsen, Howie Mandel, Camryn Mannheim, Julianna Margulies, Tim Matheson, Jenny McCarthy, Dylan McDermott, Rose McGowan, Debra Messing, Julianne Moore, Viggo Mortensen, Mike Myers, Bebe Neuwirth, Chris Noth…


…Tatum O’Neal, Al Pacino, Anna Paquin, Mandy Patinkin, Amanda Peet, Sean Penn, Lou Diamond Phillips, Joaquin Phoenix, David Hyde Pierce, Natalie Portman, Bill Pullman, Dennis Quaid, Lynn Redgrave, John C Reilly, Christina Ricci, Eric Roberts, Chris Rock, Mimi Rogers, Mark Ruffalo, Rene Russo, Katey Sagal, Bob Saget, Horatio Sanz, Live Schrieber, Martin Sheen, Sam Sheperd, Talia Shire, Martin Short, Alicia Silverstone, Jada Pinkett Smith, Jimmy Smits, Suzanne Somers, David Soul, Kevin Spacey, David Spade, James Spader, Rod Steiger, French Stewart, Sharon Stone, Madeline Stowe, Elizabeth Taylor, Charlize Theron, Uma Thurman, Jennifer Tilly, Marissa Tomei, Mark Wahlberg, Sigourney Weaver, George Wendt, Forest Whittaker, Owen Wilson, Reese Witherspoon, and Renee Zellweger!

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13 Comments:

At 8:11 AM, Blogger pissed off patricia said...

What about Lisa Simpson? I hear she should be on the list too.

 
At 10:08 AM, Blogger Lola Heatherton said...

I'm a celebrity. My name's not on the list.

 
At 10:35 AM, Blogger Frederick said...

Speaking of Lisa Simpson, how do you type out that sound that her father makes when drooling over a donut....
glggllgluh...Jessica Alba.

 
At 7:35 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

POP: Lisa reminds me of another yellow, sax-playing liberal I think we all know (hint: his name rhymes with "Bill Clinton!"

Lola: My sources tell me that back in 1984 you bought a bake-sale brownie sponsored by the PTA (Prevent Taxation, America,) the baked-goods division of the GOP. Thus, you must love America just a smidge.

Fred: Sure, Miss Alba might be a hot tamale, but can she offer you the cool drink of America-loving to wash her down. No, no she can't.

DH: First of all, thank you for bringing some much-needed conservative gravitas to this hippie-infested site. Second, Miss Johansson's first name is, of course, "Scarlett"...a deep, deep shade of red. Clearly, her parents loved her.

 
At 9:13 PM, Blogger Laurie said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

 
At 9:14 PM, Blogger Laurie said...

Hey, Rex, is Anne Bancroft putting us in danger from beyond the grave? She died last year, man.

 
At 9:33 PM, Blogger I'm Stranger than Fiction said...

So any person who demands accountability from the government hates America?

Do people who oppose the war hate the soldiers? Because if so, someone should tell all my active duty friends that I really hate them.

 
At 9:39 PM, Blogger Rex Kramer, Danger Seeker said...

Laurie: I intended to leave the dead in peace, but their America-hating from beyond the grave demanded otherwise!

Monica: Don't worry, they already know.

 
At 10:02 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah, I'm sure they do. So here's a question:

Instead of reprinting an unoriginal list, why don't you post some original thoughts about some of these people?

I can give you plenty of info on Viggo, but your're on your own for the rest.

 
At 10:43 PM, Blogger Rex Kramer, Danger Seeker said...

Monica: Generally speaking, I limit my posts to three paragraphs to cater to my hippie audience's diminished attention span (this poly-paragraphical patriotic piece was a special treat for those who have been faithfully taking their ritilin.) Thus, these foreign concepts you describe ("original thought?") would no doubt be too cumbersome.

Besides, do you know how much of Rush Limbaugh's show I missed while culling through the list (that can be viewed at the linked site) for those Hollywood heathens who hate our freedoms the most?

I believe I'm owed an apology!

 
At 1:06 AM, Blogger glasshill said...

hey Brendan Fraser's Canadian! clever boy...!

oh God, as if I need another reason, but Viggo I love you even more...

 
At 2:36 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh yes, just because we don't support Bush and his neo-con whackheads means we're unpatriotic. I'm glad to see so many of the people that are regularly on our screens see that Bush is running this country into the ground.

 
At 9:47 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Susan Dey.....I saw the Partridge family bus is in Bogota! I saw it
all painted with very rude antiliberal obscene graffiti!en Espanol! The windshield was smashed and the paint all slashed and peeling. I guess the last vestiges of liberalism can be seen in a country that has thrown off liberalism and its adherants. My hats off to Colombia...someone PLEASE! tell Susan... she doesn't really want to know this one but must... te hee hee!

 

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