THIS FRIDAY NIGHT, FREEDOM NAPS

Rex Attends to Domestic Issues

(Orlando) For the first time since his first son (and hippie-hating heir-apparent) was born last month, Spurious George’s danger-seeking demagogue, Rex Kramer, was tonight assigned the family values task of unilaterally caring for all three of his children while Mrs. Kramer ventures forth for a night of doily-darning with the PTA ladies. In addition to defending the homeland, Rex will also be preparing his regular Saturday sermon for the hippies at The Blue Republic while simultaneously watching split-screened and Tivo-ed past episodes of Family Ties for evidence of Michael J. Fox’s treachery…thus, he has little time to educate the masses here at Spurious George this evening.

Fear not, freedom-lovers, for Rex shall return tomorrow, rested and refreshed for the final dash to the mid-term elections…but sometime after the Florida-Georgia game (one must have priorities, after all!)