AXIS OF AMERICA-HATING EXPOSED

Hillary-Lamont Form Unholy Alliance

(Buffalo) Citizens of Connecticut who doubt insurgent candidate Ned Lamont’s America-hating bona fides should now have all the evidence they need, as Spurious George has learned that the Che Guevera disciple is now in bed with America’s pre-eminent freedom-hater, Senator Hillary Clinton (not literally “in bed,” of course. I mean, we here at SG are fairly certain that Ned’s not Hillary’s type. Wink, wink!)

The two titans of treason recently met at a cheap airport motel under the guise of discussing strategy for Lamont’s commie crusade against fair-and-balanced Joe Lieberman. However, through a hotel staffer SG was able to learn (albeit hampered by a language barrier) that the pair of patriotism-haters may have been making plans for beyond 2006. “Servicio de habitación, Senor Kramer,” tipped the anonymous informant through a chained and bolted hotel room door, which intrepid reporter Rex Kramer (Non-Spanish-Speaker) later interpreted to mean “The man-woman and the effeminate man will be on the 2008 presidential ticket!”

News of this duo of democracy-destroying’s plans came as a shock to former President Bill Clinton, who has recently been touring Connecticut sorority houses in support of his good friend Joe Lieberman. “I feel Joe Lieberman’s pain. I know what it’s like when a blowjob, whether received by the President, or in Joe’s case, giving one to the President, can ruin your legacy.” Clinton stated that he would continue to work toward Lieberman’s re-election, but admitted that doing so might cause some tension in the Clinton household. “Please don’t tell Hillary I’m behind Joe,” pleaded the former President to this reporter. “She might make me be the woman. Again.”